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Frankie Feedback (Part 10) Presents: “I Love the Smell of Vitriol in the Morning” 
E-MAIL FRANK OCHIENG PREVIOUS PARTS: “Nothing Like the Flow of a Good Old Moviegoer’s Angst” “The Moviegoer Strikes Back!” “Penny for your Pithy Thoughts” "Meet Frank Ochieng, Cinema Cynic" “A Poisoned Pen, An Opinionated Mind” “They’re Out for Blood, Och!” "Frank(ly) Speaking..." "Requiem of a Moviekiller" "Are You Cruisin’ for a Cinematic Bruisin’?" Who would ever imagine that there would be ten entries of Frankie Feedback columns gracing the site at TheWorldJournal.com? I guess that goes to show how much passionate input that so many of you movie maniacs have out there in Movieland. Despite the fact that I have the checkered popularity of a skunk at an air refreshner convention, someone has to bring the heated movie criticism to the forefront no matter how welcomed or dismissed it may be in content. Never let it be said that yours truly hasn’t allowed the Filmmaking Faithful to rebut or relish my critiquing assessments. After being called everything under the sun from hapless to heartless or insightful to innovative, one cannot deny the resiliency of the misunderstood movie reviewer. Fear not all you cinematic cynics ‘cause you still have the Frankie Feedback forums to vent your frustrations and/or praise. In any event, let’s pause for a moment then resume to the business at hand—raking over the coals…er, I mean…constructively discussing film-related fodder with Frankie. And now here’s the latest edition of cinema-related sentiments to be shared or aired. Frankie Feedback (Part 10) “I Love the Smell of Vitriol in the Morning” proudly features the following: Comments made to Frank about his reviewing style in reference to Sci-Fi film analysis: Homosap writes: “Folks, having dabbled in this website for quite a while now I wanted to get a general reaction on Frank Ochieng as a reviewer. I am generally pretty easy going and, as a fan of SF, I have seen/read my fair share of rubbish. I have to say that, for me, Frank takes rubbish to a whole new level. His work is riddled with inaccuracies, his review of one of the LOTR films was a classic example, to the point at which you wonder if he has seen/read what is being reviewed. Then there is the writing itself, reads to me like a child doing a school story with a thesaurus in hand. I don't get a buzz out of trashing anyone but do feel that the SF community is far too tolerant. Oh and please let me know if I have missed the point and his work is some sort of spoof. I don't always get that sort of humour particularly as an ongoing theme. The Discworld series is a great example of taking a joke too far, 2 or 3 books was probably the limit on that one!” Frank’s response: “I wanted to take the liberty in responding to your criticisms regarding my critiquing abilities as a film reviewer. Apparently you are dissatisfied with my approach to assessing the content of various sci-fi movies I dutifully review on a regular basis. And you were even driven enough to cite my LOTR film reviews as a classic example of ineptitude. Listen, if you feel that adamant about the style of my "flawed" written work and feel the need to justify your discontentment then fine...that's your given right to express your opinion. Personally, I really don't care one way or the other if you cozy up to my brand of movie analysis or not. But let's not get carried away here in your wayward attempt to solicit a hysterical response toward my cinematic contributions. Granted you are not the first individual to be turned off by my big screen impressions and you certainly won't be the last. However, it appears that your particular forum for gathering a negative consensus of my so-called "nonsensical" film reviews seems so over-the-top and self-absorbed. To paraphrase you: "Frank takes rubbish to a whole new level" and "his work is riddled with inaccuracies" or "reads to me like a child doing a school story with a thesaurus in hand". Hey, as they say...you can't please everybody. And if you think that my work is some sort of spoof then good for you--get your chuckles the best way you can. A movie fan of a specific genre taking to task a supposedly misinformed movie critic is about as original as finding ants at a July picnic. Although your gripes are genuine to your agenda, there's nothing that you haven't said in your diatribe that deflates what I am hired to do--serve up my analysis of film themes the best way I see fit. My credentials speak for themselves--I am syndicated by countless Internet-based venues where my "shortcomings as a reviewer" are solidly displayed. I am a member of the Online Film Critics Society and the Internet Entertainment Writers Association. I have been featured and quoted in many capacities pertaining to my movie-related observations that you find utterly unacceptable. And who knows, maybe many others share your very same sentiments? Whatever the case, you are always welcomed to discontinue reading my film-related fodder as there are other reviewers available to meet your proper expectations. In any event, I do thank you for your feedback regardless of how indifferent and harsh it may be in its overwrought presentation. “ Comments made to Frank based on the response from Homosap’s opinions (expressed above): ZenGirl writes: “Frank, if it's any consolation, I think your reviews are fab. While you might not pander to genre fan pedantry, which I think is where your rather blinkered critic is coming from, your reviews are always amusing and normally - for my tastes - right on the button. Reviews, like nit-picks by dumb-ass critics - are always one person's opinion. Guess you can't please everyone - but you got a happy old fan in me!” --ZG Frank’s response: “ZG, you are that rare breed of creature that I longed to have emerge from the depths of filmdom oblivion—the sensible individual! In all seriousness, I appreciate your support and positive feedback!” Comments made to Frank based on the review BIRTH: Rory McTavish writes: “I thought this film was awful. It seemed like Jonathon Glazer wanted to do something very shocking ie. woman and boy in love, but couldn't make it too shocking, so it tapered off at the end, and left so many unanswered questions. It was very boring to watch with several close-ups or scenes where nothing happens for minutes on end that just seemed very pointless. I kept trying to work out if something important was happening during these, but they just seemed to pad the film out and try to make it look artsy and myseterious. I found the boy Sean unlikeable and stubborn as opposed to introverted and mysterious and found it difficult to conjure up any feelings for these self-absorbed and 2D characters. Go and see it, if like, me there is a 2-for-1 offer on tickets at your cinema and you want an opportunity to wear your new coat out. Otherwise, I'd give it a miss.” Frank’s response: “Interesting take on BIRTH, Rory! I wasn’t that keen on giving it a passing mark either but I must admit that I felt a little more feeling in its sophisticated angles than you did. Still, you did make some rather astute observations about Glazer’s intentions to serve up an awkward shock value quotient disguised as an artsy romance melodrama between a seemingly confused grown woman and a mysterious moppet having a forbidden affair based on emotional feelings from yesteryear.” Comments made to Frank based on the review WITHOUT A PADDLE: Nicole Janel Wensel writes: “This movie was a very good actually a very very great movie and I can’t wait for it to come out on DVD” Frank’s response: “I’m sorry Nicole but you are truly up the creek WITHOUT A PADDLE concerning your assessment of this crass and clueless comedy that has all the generated wit of a grizzly bear mauling in the woods. I guess it doesn’t take much to please your entertaining tastes, huh? Oh well, to each his/her own I suppose”. Comments made to Frank based on the review SEED OF CHUCKY: GFD writes: “Frank says it all, dissapointing and lame offspring to make a few more bucks in the name of Chucky. If i could, i'd give it 1/2 a Star and ask for a refund at the box office”. Frank’s response: “Amen, GFD, amen!!” Comments made to Frank based on his reviewing style (follow-up to detractor Homosap’s comments above): Homosap writes (yet again): “I know what you mean but a critic is a critic, it's a bit like fleas on fleas. I hadn't realised that I was being pedantic when I expected facts 'quoted' in reviews to be accurate. Love your line in the Two Towers review ref a group of tree like creatures called Treebeards. Great reply to my original post, supports a lot of what I said pretty well, why use 10 words when 40 will do, eh? I am sure you must be well respected in your field though you do seem rather sensitive for one who would, I assume, live & die by the pen! I cannot claim to have read a broad body of your work and, quite frankly, probably never will. But from an editing viewpoint, I could trim your reviews by 80% and still end up with something, overlong, overwordy and innacurate. More power to your pen Frank it is good to see that the world of the critic retains the qualities for which it has long been famed.” Frank’s response: “Ah, Mr. Homosap is back for more poking of the pins in my personalized voo doo doll. And to partially quote Homosap: “I cannot claim to have read a broad body of your work and, quite frankly, probably never will. I could trim your reviews by 80% and still end up with something, overlong, overwordy and innacurate”. Geez Homosap, you’re quite the flatterer! Try not to hold back how you really feel about my “atrocious” writing. So I’m extremely verbose and not perfect in formulating my thoughts and facts, right? Guess I’m guilty as charged providing your sole role as judge, jury and executioner. And you’re quite the philosopher, too. (“I know what you mean but a critic is a critic, it’s a bit like fleas on fleas”). Huh? Hmmm…so much for my bid for the Pulitzer Prize in film criticism! In any event, I’ll try not to lose too much sleep. Since I won’t be on your all-time “greatest movie reviewer” list anytime soon, at least I can give you your due for being honest in your disliking of my so-called long-winded and misguided write-ups. I guess it shows with this garrulous response back to you! Oh well, as I maintained before you are welcome to read other movie scribers that aren’t so wordy and flawed. As for that age-old adage, you simply cannot please or make EVERYBODY love you! Whatever!” Click here to comment on this article. Frank Ochieng © TheWorldJournal.com |
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